Good day to all!
In all likelihood, we have all experienced several very difficult occurrences (sometimes referred to as «dark night of the soul» moments) in our lives.
These are moments whereby you feel as if an overwhelming tidal wave of exasperation or desperation is all but consuming you and there is absolutely nothing you can do to fight it back.
What follows are 8 suggestions on quick and simple (not necessarily easy, though) actions you could take to escape from the potentially toxic heat of such moments or at least to not allow them to bear a detrimental or, even worse, lasting impact on you. The more of these actions you can engage with at a given, tough instance, the better the result for you will be:
- Stop whatever you are doing, no matter what it is (unless it is a life or death task; however, if it were so, you would probably not have entered in such a difficult state of mind in the first place). Make sure you disengage yourself from it and from any thoughts around it;
- Realise that whatever is happening is 100% taking place inside you, therefore it is in reality completely under your control (again, if you were facing a clear and present external danger, you would not have entered in such a state of mind in the first place);
- Close your eyes and start mentally, and very slowly, counting down from 10, from 20, from 50 or even from 100 all the way to zero (the worse the sensation you experience, the higher the number you should elect to start counting down from). In doing so, make sure to take very deep breaths (5-6 inhales and respective exhales per minute). Should you still feel in deep distress when reaching zero, repeat the mental countdown as many times as needed until you clearly know and feel that you are outside the «red risk» zone;
- Return to the Centre of your Existence. The Centre of your Existence is usually a specific point in space (and time; even though it can also be timeless) whereby you feel absolutely safe and positively untouchable. It’s the central point of reference in your life. Usually, but not always, it’s a very specific location in or around the place where you grew up (such as, for instance, an armchair in your parents’ flat, the shade under a big tree in the garden of your childhood house or a specific bench in the playground where you used to spend most of your time when you were young). More on that maybe in an upcoming post, but for now make sure to find and/or define the Centre of your Existence, if not already done so;
- Go outdoors for a walk of at least 15 minutes, ideally in the nature. If you are in an urban area, go to any nearby park, no matter how small it may be. If there is no park and not even a garden close by, just find a clearing or open area (such as a square) where the sky is accessible to your entire field of vision in a direct, unhindered fashion;
- Observe any form of animal life that happens to be nearby (cats, dogs, squirrels, rabbits, birds, anything). Just entirely focus your attention on what they are doing, recording every single move they make, as if it bore an enormous significance of cosmic proportions that will be revealed to you when the time is right;
- Get in touch with someone you truly love and/or trust and ask to speak with them as soon as possible. Relinquish any feeling of embarrassment or of you being a «burden» when doing so. In extreme cases, even a short, and perhaps superficially meaningless, interaction with a seemingly random passer-by, with whom you may feel a momentary connection, can do miracles. In the unlikely and unfortunate event there is no possibility to reach out to anyone, close your eyes and enter into an imaginary dialogue with any person you truly admire and trust; even if you don’t know them; even if they are but a figment of your imagination;
- Complete a pending task; no matter how trivial it may be (even carefully folding a single piece of clothing can do the trick). This «quick win» can be crucial in lifting you out and away from a dangerous, psychologically and existentially low, moment.
And you can always get in touch with me in more than one ways, most of which can be found here: https://alexarchos.com/
Be well.
